spa for the soul - meditating

“Through meditating we explore in order to know more and more of Abba. Before we find this reality, we only BELIEVE; through experiencing a relationship, we come to KNOW.”

Morton Kelsey

To know someone, I need to spend time with them. I need to talk to them and I need to listen. The more I know them, the less I need to depend on words. I have a couple of people in my life who can just look at me and know what I am feeling. There is no need to explain myself in great detail. I am known by them.

It is that way with God. In the beginning of my relationship with him I talked…a lot. Now I talk less and listen more. There is more of a comfort level there…more of a ‘knowing’. I am learning to rest in the fact that He loves me.

Considering meditating, reflecting, pondering on who He is. Meditate on His love and His presence. Ask for nothing more than to know Him and be known by Him.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Dennis Wong http://www.flickr.com/photos/denniswong/3818488264/

fine wine

“Standing nearby were six stone water jars, used for Jewish ceremonial washing. Each could hold twenty to thirty gallons. Jesus told the servants, “Fill the jars with water.” When the jars had been filled, he said, “Now dip some out, and take it to the master of ceremonies.” So the servants followed his instructions.”
John 2: 6-8 NLT

The first miracle of Jesus. He took ordinary water and turned it into the finest wine. For the past couple years this passage has been on my heart. I’ve known about for over thirty years but recently it has taken on new meaning.

It speaks to transformation. Taking something mundane and ordinary and transforming it into something precious and valuable. I no longer see this as just Jesus’ first miracle but I see it as a foreshadowing of what He came here to do. Change you…change me….from broken, lost souls into people who live, breathe and move in Him so that His beauty is reflected in our spirits.

May you know today that if you are intentional about pursuing Jesus that you are transforming every moment, moving closer to the person you were created to be. Allow Him to continue the transformation as you give more and more of yourself over to Him.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by quacktaculous http://www.flickr.com/photos/quacktaculous/3020750515/

rhythms

“There are greater rhythms that govern how life grows: circadian rhythms, seasons and hormonal cycles and sunsets and moonrises and great movements of seas and stars. We are part of the creation story, subject to all its laws and rhythms.
When we rest, we can relish the seasons of a moment, a day, a conversation. In relationships we sense the rhythms of contact and withdrawal, of giving and receiving, of coming close, pulling away, and returning. To surrender to the seasons and flowerings and dormancies is to savor the secret of life itself.”
Wayne Muller, Sabbath

Christmas is past as are all the preparations that go along with it. Were there things you had planned on doing leading up to Christmas that you just didn’t get to? Like baking cookies, having intimate evenings with family and friends, contemplating the birth of Jesus? I always have the best of intentions but before I know it the season has blown by me and I’ve not gotten to some of things I had planned to do. For example, I bought an Advent wreath last year. I downloaded what it is that one does with an Advent wreath. I could envision myself lighting each candle, saying whatever I was supposed say and being very mindful about this sacred ‘waiting’ period before celebrating Christ’s birth.

So much for good intentions. First of all, I got the Christmas decorations out after the first weekend of Advent. So, I put the wreath in the middle of the table and very unceremoniously put the first candle in. The second week, I didn’t think about it until Sunday night and I again, without any thought, put the second candle in. This pattern continued until I had an Advent wreath complete with all four candles. None of them had been lit, no words spoken over them, no thought given to their meaning.

It is so easy to slip out of rhythm. So easy to not be mindful or attentive to what is happening around me. So easy to set a pace that doesn’t allow me to rest until my head hits the pillow at night. How much do I miss because of ignoring the natural rhythms of the seasons… or day and night – or the intentional rhythms I try to put into place to continue to keep myself aware of God’s presence? A lot.

How are your rhythms? How are you doing at slowing down long enough to pay attention to what is right in front of you? I invite you to consider how you are doing today moving in rhythms with the Spirit. Join me as I look ahead to a New Year and a new opportunity to live into healthy rhythms.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by borkur.net http://www.flickr.com/photos/borkurdotnet/378718814/

solitude

“Loneliness is the poverty of self, solitude is the richness of self. “
Luci Shaw, Breathe for the Bones

Many times people confuse solitude with loneliness. They do not like being alone or feeling alone. But solitude is not being alone. Solitude is being present to the Creator God. It is being more alive and more present than you ever thought possible. It is feeling fullness in the absence of all things..…except God. What more could you desire?

Consider spending some time today in solitude, being completely open and present to God. Doing this on a consistent basis will change the way you see yourself, see the world and see Him.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Delphine Devos http://www.flickr.com/photos/devosdelphin/3064856333/

darkness

Darkness may seem like a place where nothing is happening. Consider a seed in the ground. It is surrounded by darkness. It seems silent and dormant. But in that dark, solitary place, it germinates. Above the surface, you cannot tell that anything is happening. But below, new life begins.

It is the same with you and I. There are times when I feel as if I am separated from God’s presence. If I rely only on my feelings or my senses, I might believe that God is not there, not working. I must come to a place of trust. In that place I would know that He is there whether I can feel him or not. God may seem to be hidden but He is present and working.

Do you feel like He isn’t there? Do you feel separated from Him? Do you feel like you are in the dark? Know that He is there. Know that He is working even though you cannot sense it. All you need to do is surrender to the work He wishes to do. Consider what that might look like today.


Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Rudolf_Schuba http://www.flickr.com/photos/rudolf_schuba/771719456/

He is here....

JOY TO THE WORLD

Joy to the world!
The Lord is come:
Let earth receive her King!
Let every heart
prepare Him room
and heaven and nature sing,
and heaven and nature sing,
and heaven and heaven and nature sing!
Joy to the world!
The savior reigns,
let men their tongues employ .
While fields and floods,
rocks, hills, and plains
repeat the sounding joy,
repeat the sounding joy,
repeat , repeat the sounding joy!
He rules the world
with truth and grace
and makes the nations prove,
the glories of His righteousness
and wonders of His love,
and wonders of His love,
and wonders, and wonders of His love.

May you sense the wonder of His love today - for you.

grace and peace,
Deb

reality

A young teenager waits as her body begins to have a mind of its own. What is happening? What do I do? How long will this take? Where will it happen? Can you even imagine?
I remember the first time I went into labor. I was scared. I thought the car ride to the hospital would never end. Could Jeff possibly hit any MORE bumps? Was he trying to make this hard? I was so uncomfortable and that was just what I was feeling in between contractions! Mary, a young teenager, had just ridden a donkey – for a long distance. If you’re not use to riding animals, after a couple of hours you are feeling the pain. Imagine doing that, pregnant. No paved roads, no way to avoid the bumps.
When we arrived at the hospital there was a great staff to greet us and help us along. Jeff was able to step aside and allow the nurses and doctors to help me. He provided moral support but he wasn’t expected to guide me through this. When they arrived in Bethlehem, they couldn’t find a place to stay. I am sure Joseph was hoping he would find not only a warm, comfortable place for Mary to have their baby, but hopefully some kind, knowledgeable women-folk to help her through this birth while he paced outside. What did he know about ‘birthing babies’? Probably nothing. And a barn? That is where it would happen. For the most incredible human birth in all of history…a barn. When I lived with my parents, we had horses. I spent a good deal of my time in a barn. All of the romantic pictures or nativity scenes we see about the birth of Jesus show a nice, tidy stable. I have never seen a manger scene that depicts the reality of a barn – you know what I mean. Maybe we could include some aroma therapy? Or perhaps a rat or two watching the young mother struggle to bear this child?
Then there is the birth itself. If you have never been part of one of the most amazing miracles God has graced us with, you may not be aware that it is also one of the messiest. Nothing neat and tidy about giving birth. Straining, groaning, grunting, pushing, fluid, blood….you get the idea. My point is we so often push past the reality of this event right to the outcome. When we do that we brush past the humanity of the individuals involved…Mary, Joseph and Jesus.

Mary gave birth just like women do now without all of the technology. No support except a husband who was probably scared witless. No angel came to talk them through this part of the journey. Two young people all alone waiting helplessly for their baby to be born. And Jesus- a little, tiny baby being squashed and compressed as Mary’s body did what pregnant-ready-to-deliver bodies do.
And today, that is where we are in the story. Waiting still. We are on the eve of the celebration of the birth that, I am assuming, if you are reading this blog, has changed your life and my life.
Today – be mindful that although it was the most spectacular birth in the entire history of the world, it was also an ordinary birth with all the pain, fear, excitement and mess that comes with every birth. Tomorrow we celebrate the Savior King who came to ransom us and build us a bridge back to God. Today, consider his humanity and the humanity of his parents who said ‘yes’ to this crazy, unknown, scary journey. Offer a prayer of thanks for the messy beauty of it all.

Grace and peace,
Deb

language

“Ugh! Bella! Werewolves are not good company to keep!”

Alice, New Moon

Several years ago, I spent two weeks in Guatemala in language school. It was hard – really hard. My brain hurt after two days. I don’t know why I thought it would be so easy. String a couple of Spanish words together and you speak Spanish, right? Who knew there would be verb tenses? And then there is that whole feminine and masculine thing! How am I supposed to know if a coffee pot is male or female??
None the less that didn’t stop me from trying to use what Spanish I did have to order food. How much trouble can you get into ordering food? So, with two of my friends, I confidently walked into the ice cream shop and ordered a cone – a cone with two scoops of chocolate ice cream. The person behind the counter just stared at me. One of my friends leaned over and said, “You just ordered a cone with 12 scoops of ice cream.” OK – back to charades.

I now find myself in the midst of learning a new language – right here in Pennsylvania. It’s called “SueSpeak”. My mother is inventing her own language. It takes a couple of times before I can connect the dots, but I have gotten pretty good at it – so good, that I am now the designated translator. When we are with family and she says something that makes the other person tilt their head and furrow their brow to see if they can make sense of it, I save the day with a translation.
Not that any of you will have the opportunity to run into my mom and have a conversation with her but just in case you do, here is a handy translation guide:

Apple Hill Medical Center is “Happy Valley”

Fashion Bug is “The Bug”

Longwood Gardens is “Roman Gardens”

Charlie Brown’s Restaurant is “The Brown Puppy”

Longhorn Steak House is “The Happy Horse”

The Eagles Nest Restaurant is “The Bird Nest”

Boar’s Head Deli Ham is “Boar’s Nest” ham

Anything that she cannot think of the word for is either a ‘do-floppy’,’ thing-a-magig’ or a ‘ thingy’.

And the newest and my personal favorite) is “rarewolf” which translated is werewolf.

Several weeks ago we were coming out a restaurant and there was the most beautiful full moon. We looked at and it was surrounded by a haze. She said, “It looks like the kind of moon that would bring out rarewolfs.” I said, “What did you say? She repeated her sentence. I said, “Rarewolf? It’s not called a rarewolf…it is a werewolf!” I was laughing so hard I could hardly stand up. We spent the rest of the ride home arguing about whether it was rarewolf or werewolf. She even said, “What the heck is a werewolf? That doesn’t even make sense! A rarewolf makes sense.” She has a point.

Although learning Spanish would probably be much more beneficial in the long run, learning SueSpeak has and will continue to be a blast. I am sure that someday, Rosetta Stone will come out with a SueSpeak version and you too can learn this fun language for only $250. :) In the meantime, I am getting them free of charge.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Dendroica Cerules http://www.flickr.com/photos/dendroica/5015936649/

listening

“……there are four kinds of listening:

Listening but not hearing.

Listening and connecting with one’s own agenda.

Listening and hearing without a personal agenda.

Intuitive listening, meaning not only hearing what was being spoken but what is not being said. Deep listening.”

Anne LeClaire
Listening Below the Noise

Who knew listening could be so complicated? Isn’t it just a matter of hearing what the other person says? Apparently not. Let’s see if I can connect this with my own personal examples.

Listening but not hearing. I think this is the kind of listening I do on a Sunday when I am watching football. Yes, ladies (and guys, if there are any of you reading) – in my house, my husband is the football widower. I have the remote and the big screen. Meals are planned around game time – bathroom breaks and drink breaks around halftime. I am serious. If I am not home for a game I want to see I record it. No joke. So, if Jeff asks me a question during a game, I listen but I don’t hear him. You know – polite enough not be rude (unless the Steelers are playing)but yet not tuned in enough to give a real answer. And ‘uh huh’ or a ‘nah’ – you know – monosyllabic. Keep it quick and simple.

Listening and connecting with one’s own agenda. This might be the listening I am capable of 10 minutes before the game starts. The thought is that if I seem attentive now and we get this conversation out of the way, I will be able to watch the game without interruption. Or – if it can wait until halftime, I can actually face him and use my big people words rather than grunts. But make sure the conversation can be concluded in 10 minutes.

Listening and hearing without a personal agenda. This one is the hard one. It is so hard to get my agenda out of the way! I think this is easier with acquaintances in a passing conversation. Believe it or not, I am capable of doing it at home (when it is not football season) and usually find it very satisfying.

Intuitive listening, meaning not only hearing what was being spoken but what is not being said. Deep listening. This requires something else altogether. For me, it requires the help of the Holy Spirit. It is a time when I am very intentional about getting myself and my agenda out of the way and giving my full attention to the person who is speaking and to the leading of the Spirit. It’s a time when I tend to be silent more than speak. It is a time when I ask questions rather than give advice. It is a time when I am dependent on God and am trusting Him to provide the insight – both to me and to the person I am listening to.

I want to cultivate more intuitive listening in my life, not only when I am with directees but when I am with friends, family, co-workers, etc. I want to provide a space where people feel heard and seen. When I am able to do that it is even better than football. :)


Grace and peace –
Deb

Photo by KrissZPhotography http://www.flickr.com/photos/1krissz/4943631761/

authenticity

“When I could finally get past what everyone might be thinking about me, I realized that ultimately I could only live my own life, and I just wanted to live in humility, in honestly and be true to myself.”

Helen

I’m not sure if this is true for you but it is easy for me to get caught up in the expectations of others. I am, by nature, a people-pleaser and being first-born, I have a tendency towards perfectionism. Although both of these traits can make you look good – either with family and friends, in the workplace or in school – it is an illusion.

The ‘people-pleasing’ only works as long as you please ‘the people’ - whoever that may be. Once you fall short of that mark, no matter what the reason, you’ve failed. It doesn’t matter if you have really failed, or if they perceived that you have failed, because in your eyes, you’re a failure.

And perfectionism? What the heck is that? It is such a set-up because it is unattainable. There was only One who was perfect and that is certainly not me.
For me, both of these are substitutes for believing in and living out of God’s love for me – just as I am. Both put me in a position of ‘doing enough’ to prove I am worthy. But my worthiness should not be found in what I do or who I please. It should be found in God. If I never accomplish another thing in my life, if I never please another person, God’s love for me remains constant.
God is gently teaching me these lessons. He is lessening my grip on the need to even try to be perfect and He is giving me glimpses of how people-pleasing is an idol that needs to released to Him.

Am I living my own life? Yes. With humility? I try. Am I being true to myself? Not when I am people pleasing and chasing after perfection, but I am moving closer every day, with Gods’ help.

How about you? Are you a people-pleaser? Do you feel the need to be perfect? If so, what do you think God wants to say to you about that? Spend some time today listening.

Grace and peace –
Deb

being present

"This is the first, wildest and wisest thing I know, that the soul exists and that is is built entirely out of attentiveness."

Mary Oliver

When we are not attentive, we miss life. We live in the past or we live in the future but we miss the now. And now is what we have. Now is when God is active and working...now is when we get the chance to participate with Him. Obviously we can see where He was in hindsight but what a beautiful thing it is to see He in the now.

But to do that we need to pay attention to what He might be saying, how He might be working and then make the choice to live into that.

My prayer for you today is that you will be aware and watching so you don't miss the presence of God, in this moment.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Kevin Henderson kevlhenrit@gmail.com

integrity

"If you are here unfaithfully with us,
You're causing great damage."

Rumi

When we are with others unauthentically, we hurt them and we hurt ourselves. To bring all of who we are to God and to our community is to be in integrity.

Consider those places where you come with less than who you truly are. Ask yourself why you would do that and reflect on what God might want to say to you.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Hawken King http://www.flickr.com/photos/hawken/239234587/

blind faith

"MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone."

Thomas Merton

I invite you to take some time today to reflect on this quote.

Grace and peace,
photo by Bruce Berrien
Debhttp://www.flickr.com/photos/bruceberrien/4445304728/

darkness to light

“Mother Teresa once said “Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted are the greatest poverty”. To this I will add: Please believe that one single positive dream is more important than a thousand negative realties.”

Adeline Yen Mah

Recently, I have had interactions with four women, all of whom I know had difficult childhoods. As I sat with them, I was struck by the reality of their lives today. If anyone of them had lived into what their families had wanted them to believe about themselves, they would be living a very different life. But…something happened to them. God. He moved into their heart and began the slow process of changing how they saw themselves. He began by giving them glimpses of how He sees them. Now, they are all living beautiful, strong, affirming lives.

And, do you know the most incredible part of it? He uses other people to reflect His love…. to be Jesus with skin on. Through others…through their eyes, through their actions, through their acceptance, through their reaching out, healing begins.

It is in the context of relationship that people change. It is not always easy but it is worth the effort. Then, as we heal, we begin to give away what was given to us.

If you are the wounded one, allow others to come near and care for you. If you have been restored to life through God’s healing touch and the love of others, give what you’ve received.

Grace and peace,
Deb

margins

I am tired. Just being honest, folks. Somehow I have allowed the margins around my life to become thinner and thinner. That means I wake up and realize I am not living what I preach. I didn’t sleep well last night and did not get up as early as I would have liked this morning. So…no intentional time with God. Doesn’t mean I didn’t sense His presence today…I did in so many ways. But I want time…no…I need time to sit down and reflect on the ways I saw Him work and move, how I heard His voice.

This isn’t being legalistic about how much time I must set aside to be with Him….or what I need to do during that time. It’s more about how I feel inside when I don’t have time with Him.I just want to be real about living what I talk about.

Hope you are carving out margins to protect your inner life. We all stray and get back on the ‘crazy hamster wheel’ of life….but, when you do, notice it and begin, as you can, to re-establish those margins. Tomorrow – yeah, I’m gonna have some margins tomorrow.

Grace and peace,
Deb

vulnerabilty

“Daring to accept myself and receive love as I am in my nakedness and vulnerability is the indispensable precondition for genuine transformation. But make no mistake about just how difficult this is. Everything within me wants to show my best ‘pretend self’ to both other people and to God. This is my false self – the self of my own making. This self can never be transformed, because it is never willing to receive love in vulnerability. When this pretend self receives love, it simply becomes stronger and I am even more deeply in bondage to my false ways of living.”
David Benner
Transformation. This is what I desire. But in order to surrender to transformation, I need to be vulnerable…to God and to others. Vulnerability has a cost. Vulnerability means letting your walls down and every time you do that you risk getting hurt.
Whenever I pretend to be someone I am not, when I feel the need to defend, to prove, to over-explain, to compete, I am not resting in God. I am taking over the reins again and trying to steer things the way I want them to go.
So – will I rest in God, be vulnerable and let my true self show through – or will I resist, argue, pretend and put myself in deeper bondage to the false self?
Each day allows me to make that choice. Today I choose vulnerability. How about you?

Grace and peace –
Deb

Photo by Kevin Henderson klherrit@gmail.com

risk

"Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."
C. S. Lewis

I have friends who are afraid to love. They have been hurt and want to avoid being hurt again at all costs. They think that it is safest to not love at all. They keep others at arm’s length.

I understand the fear. But what they don’t see is that to choose to keep your heart closed off to hurt means you keep your heart closed off to joy. Our hearts are not capable of only letting in good things. When we decide to keep out hurt we keep out joy.

Loving others involves risk. It always has and it always will. Humans aren’t perfect. There are those that will hurt us every chance they get and we need to able to identify who they are and set up appropriate boundaries. But, there are others (and I think there are far more of these!) who will love us well, even if imperfectly. All of us love imperfectly. I do, you do…all of us do. If people never took a chance on me because of what others had done to them, I’d have no one in my life.

Be willing to risk. God created us to live in community and not as loners. Risk….risk being yourself with others, risk letting others in, risk being real….risk being hurt. Know that whatever comes your way, God is able to walk you through it.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by epSos.de http://www.flickr.com/photos/epsos/4376727123/

wisdom

As the years go by, I am noticing something. I do not look like I used to! Surprise, surprise. It can be difficult to see the changes that time brings. Anne Lamott, in one of her books, has a chapter called “The Aunties”. She is referring to her derriere. The Aunties are not what they used to be. She talks about not wanting to go out in a bathing suit because she is self conscious about The Aunties. She is constantly comparing herself to other women..younger women. Then she realizes that what she does possess is the wisdom that only age brings. It is a beauty that cannot be matched by a young, fit body. And she forms a new appreciation and respect for The Aunties.

I am beginning to appreciate that. I am starting to love my wisdom; a wisdom that comes from God. I like to call is 'saging'. I am learning to appreciate the beauty that comes with age…maybe not a physical beauty but the beauty of knowing God in an intimate way.

I am constantly trying to re-align my values with His…that how I look is not as important as how I am. That what the world values is not what God values. Some days I do better than others but I think the days seeing it from God’s point of view are getting more numerous.

Today, may you value who God made you to be. May you value being known more than being beautiful. And may you thank Him for the wisdom that He has given you. Enjoy today and honor the aunties...no matter what your age. :0)

Grace and peace,
Deb

deep well

“Everything about our modern lives fights against taking time to satisfy the needs and longings of the soul. Yet if there is one place I am allowed to be selfish, it’s in the care of my soul. Out of such selfishness, I become more selfless in caring for the needs of those in my sphere of influence.”

Stephen Macchia

Many would say that the practice of silence and solitude is selfish…even ‘navel gazing’. It’s true that I am protective of my time in the morning. I want to be alone…I want to be alone with God. I love that time. But…I know that when I spend that time, I am much more available for others throughout the day. Not only to the people I love but to those I come in contact with. I see those interactions as being orchestrated by God. I can give out of a deep, full well, rather than trying to give out of a well that is dry because I haven’t taken the time to pay attention to my own relationship with God.

To be sure…the introspective life is one of investing time in yourself. But if I do it to only enrich myself, I am missing the point. One reason God gives His love and presence to me so that I can give it to others.

May you take the time to invest in your relationship with God. May you spend time just sitting in His presence. May you take the riches He shares with you during that time and carry them into your day, sharing them with those He brings into your path…and go to bed tonight knowing that you gave deeply from the well of God’s love.

Grace and peace,
Deb

open

The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy, or too impatient. One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach - waiting for a gift from the sea.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Waiting is hard…so hard. If I know what is next, what it looks like, how to prepare, I feel as if I have some control. But to just wait?

Waiting can be a sign of trust. Like the beach, being empty, open and choiceless can allow whatever God wants to come to me, to come. It isn’t that I don’t care about what is next – it that I am allowing God to choose the direction and the timing.

Are you waiting for something? What might it look like to wait – being empty, open and choiceless? Yielding all? I invite you to try.

Grace and peace,
Deb





Photo by MiqsPix http://www.flickr.com/photos/miqspix/4703082931/

sabbath

“At least one day in every seven, pull off the road and park the car in the garage. Close the door to the tool shed and turn off the computer. Stay home not because you are sick but because you are well. Talk someone you love into being well with you. Take a nap, a walk, an hour for lunch. Test the premise that you are worth more than what you produce – that even if you spent one whole day being good for nothing you would still be precious in God’s sight- and when you get anxious because you are convinced this is not so, remember that your own conviction is not required. This is a commandment. Your worth has already been established, even when you are not working. The purpose of the commandment is to woo you to the same truth.”

Barbara Brown Taylor
An Altar in the World

Why is it that I find it so easy to disregard this commandment? I would not consider stealing, murdering or adultery. I try really hard not to covet. But, I don’t even attempt practicing the Sabbath, at least not in the way that I think God intended it. If one of the purposes of Sabbath is to convince me that the world will keep turning if I stop, I haven’t stopped long enough to find out. If the purpose is to have a day filled with rest and play – that is what I call ‘vacation’. If the purpose is to focus more on being than doing, a full day seems indulgent. If the purpose is to refrain from consumerism one day a week, I’ve missed the mark.

Sabbath isn’t to be a dull, dreary day. It is meant to be a gift - a day to rest, to renew, to refresh, to play, to relax, to notice, to stop. Why would I say no to that?

Barbara Brown Taylor remarks that if we paid attention to the verses – no – the commandment that speaks to Sabbath (Lev 25) the same way we pay attention to the verses that speak to sexual practices (Lev 18) we might discover that God is just as interested in economics as He is in sex.

I find myself asking some hard questions….why is it so easy for me to disregard Sabbath? It certainly is counter-cultural, but so are many of the other things I believe and practice.

In reality, it is a beautiful gift God has offered to me…. and to you. What would it look like to begin opening that gift? I will be reflecting on this more intentionally as I move into this Christmas season. I invite you to do the same.

Grace and peace,
Deb
Photo by Kevin Henderson klherrit@gmail.com

prayer

“Trust and faith should frame our whole prayer experience. This is what allows us to let go of control and allow God to shape prayer and our encounter. Prayer involves surrender to a mysterious inner process, submitting to something God does in us. If we trust enough to let go, God will give us a gift of prayer communion that we could never create or even imagine.”

David Benner

Even in prayer, it is to my benefit to ‘let go’. As long as I insist on using prayer as a vehicle to get my way, I am misusing one of God’s most beautiful gifts. Being able to pour my heart out to Him while holding on lightly to any outcomes – or even more- having my prayer be a place of expressing to God that I want what He wants more than what I want allows me to trust that He knows best.
What might you be holding onto tightly today? What would it look like to release it into God’s hands? Could you express that to Him in a prayer of surrender? Give it a try….

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Kevin Henderson klherrit@gmail.com

silence

“When we make a place for silence, we make room for ourselves….By making room for silence, we resist the forces of the world which tell us to live an advertised life of surface appearances, instead of a discovered life – a life lived in contact with our senses, our feelings, our deepest thoughts and values.”

Gunilla Norris

Photo by Kevin Henderson - klherrit@gmail.com

spa for the soul - meditating

“Through meditating we explore in order to know more and more of Abba. Before we find this reality, we only BELIEVE; through experiencing a relationship, we come to KNOW.”

Morton Kelsey

To know someone, I need to spend time with them. I need to talk to them and I need to listen. The more I know them, the less I need to depend on words. I have a couple of people in my life who can just look at me and know what I am feeling. There is no need to explain myself in great detail. I am known by them.

It is that way with God. In the beginning of my relationship with him I talked…a lot. Now I talk less and listen more. There is more of a comfort level there…more of a ‘knowing’. I am learning to rest in the fact that He loves me.

Consider meditating, that is reflecting on, or pondering who He is. Meditate on His love and His presence.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Austinevan Found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/austinevan/3304246079/

prayer

There are times when we feel, quite simply, far too small
To contain everything we are feeling.

Maybe a moment of awesome beauty overwhelms us,
Or a piece of music brings tears to our eyes.

We hold a newborn child in our arms
And are lost for words.
We gaze, helplessly, as a loved one takes a final breath.

Or maybe we are speechless with rage,
Impotent in the face of some gross injustice,
Or some intolerable pain.

Prayer can catch us in its arms at times like these,
Often in shared rituals or rites of passage,
But also in the unspoken, and unspeakable,
Aching and yearning of our hearts.

We pray when our hearts are overflowing.

Margaret Silf
The Gift of Prayer

Photo by Makelessnoise - Found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/makelessnoise/3186230747/

wisps

“For sometimes the voice of God thunders into our lives, but more often than not, it wisps by us like a gentle breeze with a fragrant reminder of faraway fields”.

Brennan Manning

I love springtime. I know it is hard to talk about or think about spring right now as we stand on the edge of winter. But, let’s try.

I remember being a little girl standing in my front yard on Easter Sunday. As a child, we didn’t go to church accept on the major holidays, so I am decked out in my Easter dress (with hat!). I cannot remember going to church that day but I can remember the smells. I remember that damp, early morning smell. Do you know what I am talking about? It’s that rich smell of earth and dew. It is mixed with the smell of newly mowed grass…a smell that’s fresh and clean and sticks to the bottom of your shoes. It lingers when you get in the car. Those smells take me right back to that morning. It’s a lovely memory.

What if God moves in our lives like that? Like a gentle wisp of fragrance? But to notice it I need to pay attention. I have to be aware. I have to gather in the subtle evidence with all my senses.

Be attentive…allow the fragrance of His love to permeate your life. Then, when you face the edge of winter in your spiritual life, you will be able to recall its sweet scent and know that spring is just around the corner.

Grace and peace,
Deb

Photo by Waldwichtel - found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/waldwichtel/4678000392/

hope

We see the signs
but cannot always
divine their meanings.

You call us to move forward
not always knowing
whether what we grasp
in our hands
will prove to be
a seed of hope
or a thorn in our flesh.

Train our fingers,
that what brings life
we may with persistence hold,
and that which wastes
our souls
we may with grace release.

Jan Richardson
Night Visions

Photo by Mayr at http://www.flickr.com/photos/mayr/2264724288/

listen

Life is chaotic.
It’s loud and constantly moving.
No time alone.
No space.
No intentionality.
Just moving from thing to thing….task to task.
Keep moving.
Don’t stop.
It may pass you by.
The world may fall off its axis.

What? Be still?
Learn to listen?
Why?
God’s voice?
Afraid of what I might hear…
condemnation,
fear,
shame,
rejection….
But…what if…
He wants to speak something different into my life….
like love,
acceptance
forgiveness
peace,
joy,
value.
That is what He is offering.

I only need to listen….
Listen and accept.
Be still,
listen
and
hear.


deb

photo by Schristia at http://www.flickr.com/photos/schristia/2513786662/

relationships

“If our contemplation or ‘loving union with God’ does not result in a loving union with people, then it is, as John 4: 7-21 says so eloquently, not true.”

Peter Scazzero
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

How often I ask myself if I am living what I teach. Am I more loving towards others? Do I give them the benefit of the doubt or am I looking for reasons to criticize? Do I make room for a difference of opinion? Do I trust them or look for reasons to mistrust? Am I defensive? Am I willing to listen? To consider? Am I willing to reach out? To remain open or form an opinion that closes off communication? Do I label behavior without asking if my perception might be different than what was intended? Do I feel threatened by another’s success? Or power? Or opinion?

For me, how I love others is directly connected to how well I am doing in my relationship with God. How do you answer some of these questions? How are you doing at loving others? Consider spending some time today with God reviewing your relationships. I will be.

Grace and peace,
Deb









photo by Steve Snodgrass
http://www.flickr.com/photos/stevensnodgrass/4368622046/

struggle

Move over the face of
my deep,
my darkness,
my endless restless chaos,
and create,
O God;
trouble me,
comfort me,
stir me up
and calm me,
but do not cease
to breathe
your Spirit into
my wakening soul.

Jan Richardson

No matter how I feel, no matter what I am going through, He is there and can redeem it.
What are you struggling with today? What is troubling your spirit? What has you losing sleep? What has your stomach in knots?
Notice it and offer it up to Him….let it rest there.

Grace and peace,
Deb

love letter

I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world.

Mother Teresa




What an incredible thought…that I am part of a love letter that God is sending to the world. That my life speaks of who He is and how He loves me. It also is a big responsibility. I think of those times when I am less than gracious with a store clerk…or the person who cuts me off in traffic…or the people in the grocery store who block the aisle with their cart while they are having a conversation with someone else.

I want to always be aware of the fact that my life is being observed. There are people who are watching to see if Jesus has really made a difference in my life or if I only know the right words to say. I definitely want my life to be part of that love letter to the world.

I invite you to think about how your life, uniquely, speaks of His love for those around you. Take some time to reflect on that beautiful truth.

Grace and peace,
Deb

photo by Stephanie: http://www.flickr.com/photos/stephanie_in_love/4254709763/in/photostream/

know thyself

“You try being alone without any form of distraction and see how quickly you want to get way from yourself and forget what you are.”

J. Krishnamurti

There is a sweet little cottage I use sometimes to get away for a couple of days. When I go there, I take the first hour or so to unpack and set up – put my food away, get my books and journal out and organize my things. I take some time to settle in. I sit, I write, I read, I pray. Then I eat. Yes, I said I eat. I don’t eat big meals but I seem to snack...a lot. Then I sleep. Not only do I sleep at night but I nap – something I never do at home. What is that about? I think it may be partly due to exhaustion. But I also think it has to do with not wanting to be with myself.

Don’t get me wrong. I kinda like me. I have grown on myself over the years. But I am not use to my own company...only my company, for long periods of time. It is rare that I am all alone without any distractions. Several years ago, being all alone for a weekend would have been inconceivable. Being alone without TV would have been akin to torture. But, I have been practicing being with myself. It sounds so much more spiritual to say I go away to be with God – and I do. But I also am with myself and that has been a practice that has been at times uncomfortable and at other times, beautiful. I am still getting used to me.

When is the last time you were alone for more than a day without any distractions? How much do you like to be with you? Are you good company for yourself? Or do you want to just leave yourself behind for better company? Consider spending some time with yourself in the near future. Invite God to come along as you get to know yourself. Granted there will be parts of yourself you won’t enjoy seeing but God will show you other parts – the parts that reflect Him and you will be glad you decide to spend time with the person that is….. you.

Grace and peace,
Deb

evening prayer

Let me fall asleep
as who I am,
and awake
one small uncluttered step
closer to you,
one small step closer
to the person I want to be ~
it will be enough.

John Kirvan

lost

“They needed 40 years in the wilderness to learn the ‘holy art of being lost’.”

Barbara Brown Taylor

Obviously she is talking about the Israelites. 40 years. Slow learners? It might be easy for us to say yes to that question but really – aren’t we all slow learners when it comes to the ‘holy art of being lost’? This is not the lost that we think about when someone doesn’t know God. It is more the lost that says we still need to be led, we need to be guided.

It is a subtle thing that happens as we are longer in our faith. We think we know. Know what? Know the right answers. Know what God is doing. Know exactly what the scripture means. Know who is in and who is out. Know just what the right thing is to say to make sure you are ‘in’. Know how God would feel about certain things. Know that our way is the only right way.

We lose our innocent and childlike wonder about who God is. We lose the awe of discovery. We lose site of the fact that God is God and we are not. We lose the ability to embrace mystery. We lose the chance to be teachable – because we think we already know.
Will you risk allowing yourself to experience the holy art of being lost? Of being open and moldable? Of being teachable and responsive to whatever God may have for you?

Take a risk – get lost today.
Grace and peace –
Deb

forgiveness

“Some of us carry the early memory of our own wrongdoing long after God and others have forgiven us. Not realizing it, we hold onto regrets. We forget that time and grace wash clean.”

Emilie Griffin
Small Surrenders

I was recently with a group of women who spent time looking at some of their own failings. We looked at how damaging it can be when we refuse to accept the forgiveness of God. We are bound by chains of shame and regret. Those chains inhibit us from giving all we have and all we are to God. Our focus is more about our shortcomings than God’s ability to redeem them.
What chains are binding you today? What wrongdoing have you held onto? Consider taking it to God and leaving it there. Let grace wash it clean.

grace and peace,
~ Deb

mid-day prayer

God, by whom we are guided in judgment,
and who raises up for us light in the darkness.
Grant us, in our doubts and uncertainties,
the grace to ask what you would have us to do,
that your spirit of wisdom may save us
from all false choices and
in your straight path we may not stumble.
Through Jesus Christ our Lord,
~ Amen

The Collect for Grace

celtic prayer

I arise today
embraced in the arms
of God the Father,
empowered by the strength
of God the Spirit,
immersed in the love
of God the Son.
I arise today
in the company
of the Trinity.
Father, Spirit and Son,
I arise today.

~ John Birch

integrity

The man who cannot endure to have his errors and shortcomings brought to the surface and made known, but tries to hide them, is unfit to walk the highway of truth.”

James Allen

Why a quote on integrity? Did you see the picture from Saturday’s post? YIKES! I couldn’t see the watermark on the image when I found it on Google Images! I opened the blog yesterday to post and when the photo came up, I gasped! Gee - not too subtle there, Deb. It’s like the criminal who holds up the bank and shows the teller their ID! Time to own my error and my shortcoming. And, apparently time to start taking my own photos….or change the prescription in my glasses!!!! Can I blame it on age or carelessness? Either way, my bad. Apologies.
Hope you have a day in which you will not need to ‘own’ your errors or your shortcoming. But if you do, just know you can do it with grace. And humor never hurts either.

Grace and peace –
Deb
And, this photo is mine. 

nature

"God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, but also on trees, and in the flowers and clouds and stars".
Martin Luther

Nature is revelation that speaks to us everyday of God and His love of beauty. It surrounds us. From the moment the sun rises in the morning and its brilliance drowns out the stars, His creativity is on display. Trees, animals, mountains, rivers, rocks, oceans, canyons, vistas, flowers, beaches, deserts, forests, plains, gorges, fish, birds, sun, moon and stars. Everyday there is an endless array of gifts for us to view, that reflect God.

Look for Him today in the created order.

Grace and peace,
Deb

doors

“No one’s spiritual practice is exactly like anyone else’s. Life meets each of us where we need to be met, leading us to the doors with our names on them.”

Barbara Brown Taylor

I have been reflecting on this topic for some time now. I have been in conversations revolving around about how, when, and why God heals. It has made me consider what in my life I should ask healing for. I completely believe that God can heal. But, I also believe that He can and will teach me beautiful things in the midst of the difficulties. My trust and faith have not been diminished by the difficulties….in fact, I feel they have grown deeper.

For whatever reason, I am content to be at the door with my name on it. What door is God leading you to?
Grace and peace ~
Deb

becoming

“In the care of souls, I am far more interested in who people are and who they are becoming in Christ than I am in what they know or what they are doing.”

Eugene Peterson

I need to live this out. I do need to be more concerned with who people are than with what they know or what they do.

But the line that moves me the most is “who they are becoming in Christ.” I am ashamed to admit that I often focus on who they have not yet become. Why do you think we do that to each other? Not give each other the benefit of the doubt. Not look at each other through the lens that God uses.

And…not only do I do that to other people, I do it to myself. It is so much easier to see what I am doing wrong…how I am falling short than to think of who I am ‘becoming’ in Jesus.

This quote challenges me to love others and to love myself. It challenges me to be more gentle and more gracious in my responses to the sin and brokenness I see in others….and in myself.

May you see the person that you are becoming in God. May you see the beautiful work He is doing in others….may you recognize redemption when you witness it.

Grace and peace,
Deb

quiet

“Living without speaking is better than speaking without living. For a person who lives rightly helps us by silence, while one who talks too much annoys us. If, however, words and life go hand in hand, that is the perfection of all philosophy.”


Abba Isidore of Pelusia

I think I talk too much. I talk less now than I used to, but I think it is still too much. I sense God calling me to talk less and listen more…not only to Him, but to others as well. I have been aware of this for the past two years. Sometimes I am more conscious of it than others but it is becoming more natural.

One problem with being an extrovert who is discovering the beauty of silence and solitude…people want to know if you are “ok”. Once you find yourself turning down some invitations, being quiet during dinner or measuring your words in conversation, they assume there is something wrong. Sometimes I am disciplining myself, being careful to speak with purpose and not just fill the space with words. Sometimes I am in a ‘quiet’ mood and sometimes, I even sense God asking me to be still, in the midst of being with others.

I wonder how many people I annoyed with going on and on about something? I wonder if there were times when someone wanted to say “Would you just be quiet”? I wonder if there were times when it seemed as if all I did was talk about myself….

What I know is that God is calling me to a place of being still…both in my spiritual life and in my social life.

Is He inviting you to a place of quiet? What would that look like for you? What would change? Consider practicing stillness….and see how God speaks.

Grace and peace,
Deb

cooperation

“The core task of all good spirituality is to teach us to “cooperate” with what God already wants to do and has already begun to do (Romans 8:28). In fact, nothing good would ever even enter our minds unless in the previous moment God had not already “moved” within us. We are always and forever seconding the motion.”

Richard Rohr

What do the shower, the few minutes before I fall asleep and the few moments when I am waking up have in common? Those seem to be prime times for me to hear God’s voice. Are those particularly active times for God or are they times when, for whatever reason, my intellect, my thinking, does not get in the way of what God wants to say? Ok…I know that saying God activity level has anything to do with my shower is just bad theology so we’ll just say the variable is on my end.

Whatever the reason, these seem to be the times when the puzzle pieces come together for me. There will be something I need to decide or pull together or figure out. I can make charts, lists, graphs, etc, with little to no progress. Then I can be falling asleep and “BAM”…there it is.

The past couple of weeks I have been struggling with a particular issue. I was being asked to do something that I felt pretty resistant to. I tried to do it but felt something was ‘off’. I kept trying to ‘figure it out’ to no avail. Then, as I was going to sleep, the reason became very clear. It made sense.

I am becoming more and more cognizant of the fact that these are times God speaks to me. And, it usually is revealed in a way that surprises and amazes me. I am trying to learn to lean into God when I have a decision to make or a situation to figure out. I need to remember that He initiates, and I respond. The more aware I can become of the fact that I am cooperating with God (and not the other way around) life becomes less tangled, less pressured.

Have something on your mind? A decision to make? A situation to work through? What would it be like to stop thinking about it, over and over, and offer it up to God, asking Him to speak when the time is right? You never know - it may make for some very interesting showers…..

Grace and peace –
Deb

presence

“Spirituality is the sacred center of which all life comes, including Mondays and Tuesdays and rainy Saturday afternoons in all their mundane and glorious details.”

Christina Baldwin

God is everywhere and in everything. Every moment has something of Him in it. All we need to do is be aware and be looking for it.

He is not only found in those activities we see as ‘sacred’ but also in the mundane….the everyday tasks we do with out even thinking about. Brushing our teeth, making our bed, doing the dishes.

When we begin to see life through these eyes, everything is sacred. Celebrate the sacred in your life.

Grace and peace,
Deb

serenity

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Sometimes this is really hard for me. I am getting better at accepting things I cannot change. And I am getting better at changing the things I can. Where I struggle, at times, is knowing the difference.
A friend of mine, Pastor John Stringer, explained it this way; he drew two concentric circles. Inside the smaller circle is ‘my responsibility’….the outer circle is labeled ‘my concern’. Whatever falls within the smaller circle are those things I have some control over. What falls in the outer circle are things that I care about but, ultimately, have little control over. When he shared this with me, it was evident that I had spent a lot of my time and energy focused on those things I have no control over.
Now, I try to take some time and assess where my energy needs to be expended. Is the situation that is bothering me something I can do anything about or is it out of my control? Once I sit down and take the time to think it through, I am better at letting go of those things I can’t change or move forward on the things I can impact.
Are there things in your life that you are frustrated by? Things you want to change but don’t seem to be able to? Maybe they are things you can’t change…you have no power to change. Consider weighing the circumstances by this standard…figure out what falls within your realm of responsibility and what falls within the area of your concern. If you can do something to change the situation, do it. If not, offer it up to God in prayer and ask Him to work as He chooses. These decisions will create an atmosphere of serenity in your life.

Grace and peace,
Deb

risk

“Fear not that your life will come to an end…fear rather that it will never come to a beginning.”

Cardinal Newman

For many years, I lived my life in such a way as to avoid my fears. I’d only try things I felt I would succeed at. I wouldn’t fly (on two separate occasions I took a train across the country for three days – one way!). I would hear God speaking to me but I was like Moses….I was full of excuses about why I couldn’t do what he was asking me to do….why he must have had me confused with someone else.

Over ten years ago I heard God asking me to step out. To fly. Not metaphorically but literally. He was asking me to get on a plane and fly to Romania. Not Ohio, but Romania. The Romania that is over there across the ocean. The ocean….that place where you really can’t land a plane. But this time, I said ‘yes’. It was a big, fat, scary yes, but a yes all the same. It took prayer, friends, and Xanax to ‘git ‘er done’. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done but also one of the most life changing. That one decision opened up a world to me that I could have only imagined before. It helped shape the ministry God wanted me to be involved in and also impacted my confidence to say ‘yes’ to Him even when I doubt my own ability.

This past year, I said another big ‘yes’ to God. I sensed Him asking me to develop a new ministry. He has given me the vision and asked me to step out and develop it. I am not sure what the outcome will be but I said ‘yes’. I recognize that this ministry is His…I’m only managing it for Him.

Are you living your life held back by fear? Do you sense God asking you to do something? What is holding you back? I invite you to give your fear to Jesus and trust Him to carry you through whatever He is calling you to do. Risk it. Consider living an outrageous life with Jesus. May your prayer be - "God _ I want to trust you more than I don't want to believe in myself."

Grace and peace,
Deb

dependence

“May all your expectations be frustrated. May all your plans be thwarted, that you may experience the powerlessness and poverty of a child and sing and dance in the love of God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.”


A prayer offered by a friend for Henri Nouwen

Complete dependence on God is what I want. I think about, I can even do it for a few moments at a time. Then I forget. Especially when things are going well. But, in those times when I feel as if things are out of control, my thoughts turn to God. Those times increase my dependence on Him. But I want more than just a ‘lifeboat’ mentality. I want to be fully aware of God’s presence and sovereignty in my life every day. May it begin today.

Grace and peace,
Deb

breathe

We don’t need to be reminded to breathe,
but we can learn to be more conscious
of this precious gift of the breath of life.

Wherever you are,
and whatever you are doing,
take a minute to become aware of your own breathing.
Don’t change its rhythm, just notice it.
Just doing this will help you become more calm,
and refresh your perspective on life.
It will also become a relief to your body,
and may even reduce your blood pressure.

Now take it a step further:

Each time you breathe out,
consciously let go, or express, any anxiety or concerns
you may have.

Each time you breathe in,
breathe in the power and the love of God,
and the life of God’s creation,
which sustains you constantly,
whether you are aware of it or not.

Practice this rhythm for a few minutes
whenever you have an opportunity.
Return to it whenever you can
and especially whenever you are feeling stressed.

Margaret Silf
The Gift of Prayer

gifts

gifts ~
unexpected,
un-asked for,
appear out of nowhere.

You give to express
your love,
your concern,
your desire for me.

like a rose left on the doorstep.

feb 07

grace and peace,
deb

waiting

“Waiting is certainly a kind of prayer, especially if you can stand howling, wide open spaces.”
Barbara Brown Taylor

Why is waiting so hard? I think it is because we realize, in the waiting, that we are not the one in control. It is a helpless place.

I have several fiends in the midst of waiting right now. Waiting for medical results. Waiting for work situations to change. Waiting for husbands to come home. Waiting for a child to return. Waiting. Waiting can seem like a howling, wide open space where we can’t seem to find the boundaries, the edges. It feels too open, too spacious. It feels as if we might just get lost in the waiting, unable to find our way back.

This morning, one of our pastors, Pastor Rob, talked about patience. Patience is always attached to waiting. It describes how we are waiting….or not. Are we pushing against the waiting or are we resting in the waiting? I think that might be what patience looks like….resting. Which, seems to come right back to trust.
Are you ‘waiting’? What are you waiting for? The test result? That phone call or email? That job offer? What would it look like to wait patiently? To trust in the waiting? To sense God’s loving arms wrapped around you in the middle of the howling, wide open space?

Consider praying not only for your situation but also for your waiting. Resist making the waiting a negative place but consider allowing the waiting to be a place of formation – the waiting itself a place of rest and trust.

Grace and peace –
Deb

pain

My heart aches for the burden you bear.
I cannot fathom its depths.
Pain untold as you witness your children languish in their own choices.
Sometimes I carry judgment ~
I want you to deal with it the way the way I would. Or would I?
How can I know how I would react?
I try to imagine but the pain of it keeps me from staying there.
If I am unable to even pretend how it feels,
how can I bring any judgment to you?

How can I love you?
How can I support you?
How can I be Jesus with skin on to you?
How can I invite myself into your pain, your world?
How can I truly be myself with you when I am in a place of blessing?
How can share my joy?

I think all I can do is leave you to the Father and ask Him to hold you – hold you in all your pain – the pain I am too frail to hold.
He knows….
how to love you,
how to support you,
how to be in your world of pain.
Because of Him I can try to enter in.
A poor substitute but He can cover my lack.
My hearts aches for the burden you bear.

Love,
deb