voluntary silence

“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence... We need silence to be able to touch souls.”

Mother Teresa

Silence is SO under-rated. And so hard to find. Often, I find myself trying to create distance from others to get some semblance of silence in my life. Yesterday I wrote about my weekend and the discernment process I am going through with my friends. We went to a lovely camp, made even lovelier by the snowfall. We had a building to ourselves which meant we could have silence when we wanted it. We appreciated that all the more after returning from the dining center that we shared with a group of elementary age kids enjoying a ‘winter blast’ weekend. The volume in that room made conversation difficult. In addition, one of the boys had a flute-like instrument that he felt the need to blow..again…and again…and again. Didn’t he know that we were deep into a spiritual process that required everyone using their inside voices? He didn’t get the memo.
I went into this weekend sick. By Saturday morning, my voice was gone. Have you ever considered how hard it is to lead a retreat when you don’t have a voice? My companions listened intently as I whispered to them. There were things I wanted to say but didn’t have the energy to. There were things I wrote on a piece of paper because it was easier. There were things that were left unsaid.
One thing I am considering is how much I contribute to the lack of silence. Why is it that I always think my words need to be heard? Can I trust God to work without my voice? When I choose not to speak, perhaps that allows room for others to speak.
I think I talk too much. My husband can confirm that. He, secretly, or not so secretly, loves the case of laryngitis I get every couple of years. He is a happy man tonight. Right now, I am involuntarily silent. I don’t have a choice. But, I want to begin to practice ‘voluntary silence’, creating space for God and others to speak. Wonder what I might learn if I just sit back and listen?
Have you ever considered how much you talk? How many times you dominate a conversation? Today, consider being voluntarily quiet, biting your tongue when you feel the need to interject something and see if the world keeps turning. I haven’t spoken in 24 hours and the earth is still turning on its axis. Amazing. :0)
Grace and peace,
Silent Deb