healing

“To ask that Christ be with us is to ask not only for protection and reassurance, or even guidance, but also for a kind of awareness and accountability that can keep us at the edge of our comfort zone and in a place of radical vulnerability. The curious question Jesus asked the afflicted, “Do you want to be healed?” might also come to us with a similar note of challenge: Do you want my companionship? Are you ready for it? Can you rise to it? Will you trust it?”

Marilyn Chandler McEntyre

When I think of the times I cried out to Jesus to keep me safe, keep those I love safe, make the way easy, remove any obstacles, etc., I notice that I was looking for Him to make the journey safe and predictable. What I have come to know is that Jesus is anything but safe and predictable. He does not call me to ‘safe’ journey, an easy journey or a cookie cutter journey. He calls me to Himself and asks me to leave the rest up to Him.

What needs to come into my life to change me, to mold me to transform me? I don’t know…but He does. When I say I want more of Him does that really mean I want Him to do whatever He needs to do to allow me to become the person He desires me to be – or does it mean I want more of Him to see what He can do for me?

Do I want to be healed? Of course I will say yes when it comes to my physical state. But His question goes much deeper than that.

Do I want to be healed from my selfishness?
My greed?

My desire for comfort?

My desire to think myself better than someone else or my way better than another’s?

From the need for justice, from my point of view?

From my need to always be understood and accepted?

From my need to have esteem in another person’s eyes?

From my need to never be criticized?

From my need to think I am always right and the other person is always wrong?

From my need to judge?

From my need for validation?

From my need to hold onto resentments and grudges?

From my ‘rights’?

From my need to argue over issues?

From my need to have the last word?

From my need to keep up with the Jones’s?

From my need to be the one who gets overhead bin space?

From being the one who always has to be heard?

From my need to dismiss someone else too make myself feel better?

From my need to protect myself from really seeing the poor?

From my need to spend?

From my need to be recognized?

From my need to have my ideas recognized as mine?

From my desire for more of __________?

Am I REALLY asking to be healed from those things and so many more? To be honest, some days I say yes to that and some days I want to wallow.


Jesus – give me a desire to be taken to the edge of my comfort zone and live in radical vulnerability. Help me to know that you love me so much that you desire to heal that within me which is broken and that this healing goes much deeper than any physical ailment I might have. May I find myself living in such deep trust that I will surrender to your work in every area of my life. May I not be content with wallowing, which is so much less than what you have for me.

May it be so…everyday.

Grace and peace ~
Deb

Photo by soulman53 http://www.flickr.com/photos/40262933@N06/5395872275/