listen

Life is chaotic.
It’s loud and constantly moving.
No time alone.
No space.
No intentionality.
Just moving from thing to thing….task to task.
Keep moving.
Don’t stop.
It may pass you by.
The world may fall off its axis.

What? Be still?
Learn to listen?
Why?
God’s voice?
Afraid of what I might hear…
condemnation,
fear,
shame,
rejection….
But…what if…
He wants to speak something different into my life….
like love,
acceptance
forgiveness
peace,
joy,
value.
That is what He is offering.

I only need to listen….
Listen and accept.
Be still,
listen
and
hear.


deb

photo by Schristia at http://www.flickr.com/photos/schristia/2513786662/

relationships

“If our contemplation or ‘loving union with God’ does not result in a loving union with people, then it is, as John 4: 7-21 says so eloquently, not true.”

Peter Scazzero
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

How often I ask myself if I am living what I teach. Am I more loving towards others? Do I give them the benefit of the doubt or am I looking for reasons to criticize? Do I make room for a difference of opinion? Do I trust them or look for reasons to mistrust? Am I defensive? Am I willing to listen? To consider? Am I willing to reach out? To remain open or form an opinion that closes off communication? Do I label behavior without asking if my perception might be different than what was intended? Do I feel threatened by another’s success? Or power? Or opinion?

For me, how I love others is directly connected to how well I am doing in my relationship with God. How do you answer some of these questions? How are you doing at loving others? Consider spending some time today with God reviewing your relationships. I will be.

Grace and peace,
Deb









photo by Steve Snodgrass
http://www.flickr.com/photos/stevensnodgrass/4368622046/

struggle

Move over the face of
my deep,
my darkness,
my endless restless chaos,
and create,
O God;
trouble me,
comfort me,
stir me up
and calm me,
but do not cease
to breathe
your Spirit into
my wakening soul.

Jan Richardson

No matter how I feel, no matter what I am going through, He is there and can redeem it.
What are you struggling with today? What is troubling your spirit? What has you losing sleep? What has your stomach in knots?
Notice it and offer it up to Him….let it rest there.

Grace and peace,
Deb

love letter

I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world.

Mother Teresa




What an incredible thought…that I am part of a love letter that God is sending to the world. That my life speaks of who He is and how He loves me. It also is a big responsibility. I think of those times when I am less than gracious with a store clerk…or the person who cuts me off in traffic…or the people in the grocery store who block the aisle with their cart while they are having a conversation with someone else.

I want to always be aware of the fact that my life is being observed. There are people who are watching to see if Jesus has really made a difference in my life or if I only know the right words to say. I definitely want my life to be part of that love letter to the world.

I invite you to think about how your life, uniquely, speaks of His love for those around you. Take some time to reflect on that beautiful truth.

Grace and peace,
Deb

photo by Stephanie: http://www.flickr.com/photos/stephanie_in_love/4254709763/in/photostream/

know thyself

“You try being alone without any form of distraction and see how quickly you want to get way from yourself and forget what you are.”

J. Krishnamurti

There is a sweet little cottage I use sometimes to get away for a couple of days. When I go there, I take the first hour or so to unpack and set up – put my food away, get my books and journal out and organize my things. I take some time to settle in. I sit, I write, I read, I pray. Then I eat. Yes, I said I eat. I don’t eat big meals but I seem to snack...a lot. Then I sleep. Not only do I sleep at night but I nap – something I never do at home. What is that about? I think it may be partly due to exhaustion. But I also think it has to do with not wanting to be with myself.

Don’t get me wrong. I kinda like me. I have grown on myself over the years. But I am not use to my own company...only my company, for long periods of time. It is rare that I am all alone without any distractions. Several years ago, being all alone for a weekend would have been inconceivable. Being alone without TV would have been akin to torture. But, I have been practicing being with myself. It sounds so much more spiritual to say I go away to be with God – and I do. But I also am with myself and that has been a practice that has been at times uncomfortable and at other times, beautiful. I am still getting used to me.

When is the last time you were alone for more than a day without any distractions? How much do you like to be with you? Are you good company for yourself? Or do you want to just leave yourself behind for better company? Consider spending some time with yourself in the near future. Invite God to come along as you get to know yourself. Granted there will be parts of yourself you won’t enjoy seeing but God will show you other parts – the parts that reflect Him and you will be glad you decide to spend time with the person that is….. you.

Grace and peace,
Deb

evening prayer

Let me fall asleep
as who I am,
and awake
one small uncluttered step
closer to you,
one small step closer
to the person I want to be ~
it will be enough.

John Kirvan

lost

“They needed 40 years in the wilderness to learn the ‘holy art of being lost’.”

Barbara Brown Taylor

Obviously she is talking about the Israelites. 40 years. Slow learners? It might be easy for us to say yes to that question but really – aren’t we all slow learners when it comes to the ‘holy art of being lost’? This is not the lost that we think about when someone doesn’t know God. It is more the lost that says we still need to be led, we need to be guided.

It is a subtle thing that happens as we are longer in our faith. We think we know. Know what? Know the right answers. Know what God is doing. Know exactly what the scripture means. Know who is in and who is out. Know just what the right thing is to say to make sure you are ‘in’. Know how God would feel about certain things. Know that our way is the only right way.

We lose our innocent and childlike wonder about who God is. We lose the awe of discovery. We lose site of the fact that God is God and we are not. We lose the ability to embrace mystery. We lose the chance to be teachable – because we think we already know.
Will you risk allowing yourself to experience the holy art of being lost? Of being open and moldable? Of being teachable and responsive to whatever God may have for you?

Take a risk – get lost today.
Grace and peace –
Deb

forgiveness

“Some of us carry the early memory of our own wrongdoing long after God and others have forgiven us. Not realizing it, we hold onto regrets. We forget that time and grace wash clean.”

Emilie Griffin
Small Surrenders

I was recently with a group of women who spent time looking at some of their own failings. We looked at how damaging it can be when we refuse to accept the forgiveness of God. We are bound by chains of shame and regret. Those chains inhibit us from giving all we have and all we are to God. Our focus is more about our shortcomings than God’s ability to redeem them.
What chains are binding you today? What wrongdoing have you held onto? Consider taking it to God and leaving it there. Let grace wash it clean.

grace and peace,
~ Deb

mid-day prayer

God, by whom we are guided in judgment,
and who raises up for us light in the darkness.
Grant us, in our doubts and uncertainties,
the grace to ask what you would have us to do,
that your spirit of wisdom may save us
from all false choices and
in your straight path we may not stumble.
Through Jesus Christ our Lord,
~ Amen

The Collect for Grace

celtic prayer

I arise today
embraced in the arms
of God the Father,
empowered by the strength
of God the Spirit,
immersed in the love
of God the Son.
I arise today
in the company
of the Trinity.
Father, Spirit and Son,
I arise today.

~ John Birch

integrity

The man who cannot endure to have his errors and shortcomings brought to the surface and made known, but tries to hide them, is unfit to walk the highway of truth.”

James Allen

Why a quote on integrity? Did you see the picture from Saturday’s post? YIKES! I couldn’t see the watermark on the image when I found it on Google Images! I opened the blog yesterday to post and when the photo came up, I gasped! Gee - not too subtle there, Deb. It’s like the criminal who holds up the bank and shows the teller their ID! Time to own my error and my shortcoming. And, apparently time to start taking my own photos….or change the prescription in my glasses!!!! Can I blame it on age or carelessness? Either way, my bad. Apologies.
Hope you have a day in which you will not need to ‘own’ your errors or your shortcoming. But if you do, just know you can do it with grace. And humor never hurts either.

Grace and peace –
Deb
And, this photo is mine. 

nature

"God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, but also on trees, and in the flowers and clouds and stars".
Martin Luther

Nature is revelation that speaks to us everyday of God and His love of beauty. It surrounds us. From the moment the sun rises in the morning and its brilliance drowns out the stars, His creativity is on display. Trees, animals, mountains, rivers, rocks, oceans, canyons, vistas, flowers, beaches, deserts, forests, plains, gorges, fish, birds, sun, moon and stars. Everyday there is an endless array of gifts for us to view, that reflect God.

Look for Him today in the created order.

Grace and peace,
Deb

doors

“No one’s spiritual practice is exactly like anyone else’s. Life meets each of us where we need to be met, leading us to the doors with our names on them.”

Barbara Brown Taylor

I have been reflecting on this topic for some time now. I have been in conversations revolving around about how, when, and why God heals. It has made me consider what in my life I should ask healing for. I completely believe that God can heal. But, I also believe that He can and will teach me beautiful things in the midst of the difficulties. My trust and faith have not been diminished by the difficulties….in fact, I feel they have grown deeper.

For whatever reason, I am content to be at the door with my name on it. What door is God leading you to?
Grace and peace ~
Deb

becoming

“In the care of souls, I am far more interested in who people are and who they are becoming in Christ than I am in what they know or what they are doing.”

Eugene Peterson

I need to live this out. I do need to be more concerned with who people are than with what they know or what they do.

But the line that moves me the most is “who they are becoming in Christ.” I am ashamed to admit that I often focus on who they have not yet become. Why do you think we do that to each other? Not give each other the benefit of the doubt. Not look at each other through the lens that God uses.

And…not only do I do that to other people, I do it to myself. It is so much easier to see what I am doing wrong…how I am falling short than to think of who I am ‘becoming’ in Jesus.

This quote challenges me to love others and to love myself. It challenges me to be more gentle and more gracious in my responses to the sin and brokenness I see in others….and in myself.

May you see the person that you are becoming in God. May you see the beautiful work He is doing in others….may you recognize redemption when you witness it.

Grace and peace,
Deb

quiet

“Living without speaking is better than speaking without living. For a person who lives rightly helps us by silence, while one who talks too much annoys us. If, however, words and life go hand in hand, that is the perfection of all philosophy.”


Abba Isidore of Pelusia

I think I talk too much. I talk less now than I used to, but I think it is still too much. I sense God calling me to talk less and listen more…not only to Him, but to others as well. I have been aware of this for the past two years. Sometimes I am more conscious of it than others but it is becoming more natural.

One problem with being an extrovert who is discovering the beauty of silence and solitude…people want to know if you are “ok”. Once you find yourself turning down some invitations, being quiet during dinner or measuring your words in conversation, they assume there is something wrong. Sometimes I am disciplining myself, being careful to speak with purpose and not just fill the space with words. Sometimes I am in a ‘quiet’ mood and sometimes, I even sense God asking me to be still, in the midst of being with others.

I wonder how many people I annoyed with going on and on about something? I wonder if there were times when someone wanted to say “Would you just be quiet”? I wonder if there were times when it seemed as if all I did was talk about myself….

What I know is that God is calling me to a place of being still…both in my spiritual life and in my social life.

Is He inviting you to a place of quiet? What would that look like for you? What would change? Consider practicing stillness….and see how God speaks.

Grace and peace,
Deb

cooperation

“The core task of all good spirituality is to teach us to “cooperate” with what God already wants to do and has already begun to do (Romans 8:28). In fact, nothing good would ever even enter our minds unless in the previous moment God had not already “moved” within us. We are always and forever seconding the motion.”

Richard Rohr

What do the shower, the few minutes before I fall asleep and the few moments when I am waking up have in common? Those seem to be prime times for me to hear God’s voice. Are those particularly active times for God or are they times when, for whatever reason, my intellect, my thinking, does not get in the way of what God wants to say? Ok…I know that saying God activity level has anything to do with my shower is just bad theology so we’ll just say the variable is on my end.

Whatever the reason, these seem to be the times when the puzzle pieces come together for me. There will be something I need to decide or pull together or figure out. I can make charts, lists, graphs, etc, with little to no progress. Then I can be falling asleep and “BAM”…there it is.

The past couple of weeks I have been struggling with a particular issue. I was being asked to do something that I felt pretty resistant to. I tried to do it but felt something was ‘off’. I kept trying to ‘figure it out’ to no avail. Then, as I was going to sleep, the reason became very clear. It made sense.

I am becoming more and more cognizant of the fact that these are times God speaks to me. And, it usually is revealed in a way that surprises and amazes me. I am trying to learn to lean into God when I have a decision to make or a situation to figure out. I need to remember that He initiates, and I respond. The more aware I can become of the fact that I am cooperating with God (and not the other way around) life becomes less tangled, less pressured.

Have something on your mind? A decision to make? A situation to work through? What would it be like to stop thinking about it, over and over, and offer it up to God, asking Him to speak when the time is right? You never know - it may make for some very interesting showers…..

Grace and peace –
Deb

presence

“Spirituality is the sacred center of which all life comes, including Mondays and Tuesdays and rainy Saturday afternoons in all their mundane and glorious details.”

Christina Baldwin

God is everywhere and in everything. Every moment has something of Him in it. All we need to do is be aware and be looking for it.

He is not only found in those activities we see as ‘sacred’ but also in the mundane….the everyday tasks we do with out even thinking about. Brushing our teeth, making our bed, doing the dishes.

When we begin to see life through these eyes, everything is sacred. Celebrate the sacred in your life.

Grace and peace,
Deb

serenity

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Sometimes this is really hard for me. I am getting better at accepting things I cannot change. And I am getting better at changing the things I can. Where I struggle, at times, is knowing the difference.
A friend of mine, Pastor John Stringer, explained it this way; he drew two concentric circles. Inside the smaller circle is ‘my responsibility’….the outer circle is labeled ‘my concern’. Whatever falls within the smaller circle are those things I have some control over. What falls in the outer circle are things that I care about but, ultimately, have little control over. When he shared this with me, it was evident that I had spent a lot of my time and energy focused on those things I have no control over.
Now, I try to take some time and assess where my energy needs to be expended. Is the situation that is bothering me something I can do anything about or is it out of my control? Once I sit down and take the time to think it through, I am better at letting go of those things I can’t change or move forward on the things I can impact.
Are there things in your life that you are frustrated by? Things you want to change but don’t seem to be able to? Maybe they are things you can’t change…you have no power to change. Consider weighing the circumstances by this standard…figure out what falls within your realm of responsibility and what falls within the area of your concern. If you can do something to change the situation, do it. If not, offer it up to God in prayer and ask Him to work as He chooses. These decisions will create an atmosphere of serenity in your life.

Grace and peace,
Deb

risk

“Fear not that your life will come to an end…fear rather that it will never come to a beginning.”

Cardinal Newman

For many years, I lived my life in such a way as to avoid my fears. I’d only try things I felt I would succeed at. I wouldn’t fly (on two separate occasions I took a train across the country for three days – one way!). I would hear God speaking to me but I was like Moses….I was full of excuses about why I couldn’t do what he was asking me to do….why he must have had me confused with someone else.

Over ten years ago I heard God asking me to step out. To fly. Not metaphorically but literally. He was asking me to get on a plane and fly to Romania. Not Ohio, but Romania. The Romania that is over there across the ocean. The ocean….that place where you really can’t land a plane. But this time, I said ‘yes’. It was a big, fat, scary yes, but a yes all the same. It took prayer, friends, and Xanax to ‘git ‘er done’. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done but also one of the most life changing. That one decision opened up a world to me that I could have only imagined before. It helped shape the ministry God wanted me to be involved in and also impacted my confidence to say ‘yes’ to Him even when I doubt my own ability.

This past year, I said another big ‘yes’ to God. I sensed Him asking me to develop a new ministry. He has given me the vision and asked me to step out and develop it. I am not sure what the outcome will be but I said ‘yes’. I recognize that this ministry is His…I’m only managing it for Him.

Are you living your life held back by fear? Do you sense God asking you to do something? What is holding you back? I invite you to give your fear to Jesus and trust Him to carry you through whatever He is calling you to do. Risk it. Consider living an outrageous life with Jesus. May your prayer be - "God _ I want to trust you more than I don't want to believe in myself."

Grace and peace,
Deb

dependence

“May all your expectations be frustrated. May all your plans be thwarted, that you may experience the powerlessness and poverty of a child and sing and dance in the love of God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.”


A prayer offered by a friend for Henri Nouwen

Complete dependence on God is what I want. I think about, I can even do it for a few moments at a time. Then I forget. Especially when things are going well. But, in those times when I feel as if things are out of control, my thoughts turn to God. Those times increase my dependence on Him. But I want more than just a ‘lifeboat’ mentality. I want to be fully aware of God’s presence and sovereignty in my life every day. May it begin today.

Grace and peace,
Deb

breathe

We don’t need to be reminded to breathe,
but we can learn to be more conscious
of this precious gift of the breath of life.

Wherever you are,
and whatever you are doing,
take a minute to become aware of your own breathing.
Don’t change its rhythm, just notice it.
Just doing this will help you become more calm,
and refresh your perspective on life.
It will also become a relief to your body,
and may even reduce your blood pressure.

Now take it a step further:

Each time you breathe out,
consciously let go, or express, any anxiety or concerns
you may have.

Each time you breathe in,
breathe in the power and the love of God,
and the life of God’s creation,
which sustains you constantly,
whether you are aware of it or not.

Practice this rhythm for a few minutes
whenever you have an opportunity.
Return to it whenever you can
and especially whenever you are feeling stressed.

Margaret Silf
The Gift of Prayer

gifts

gifts ~
unexpected,
un-asked for,
appear out of nowhere.

You give to express
your love,
your concern,
your desire for me.

like a rose left on the doorstep.

feb 07

grace and peace,
deb

waiting

“Waiting is certainly a kind of prayer, especially if you can stand howling, wide open spaces.”
Barbara Brown Taylor

Why is waiting so hard? I think it is because we realize, in the waiting, that we are not the one in control. It is a helpless place.

I have several fiends in the midst of waiting right now. Waiting for medical results. Waiting for work situations to change. Waiting for husbands to come home. Waiting for a child to return. Waiting. Waiting can seem like a howling, wide open space where we can’t seem to find the boundaries, the edges. It feels too open, too spacious. It feels as if we might just get lost in the waiting, unable to find our way back.

This morning, one of our pastors, Pastor Rob, talked about patience. Patience is always attached to waiting. It describes how we are waiting….or not. Are we pushing against the waiting or are we resting in the waiting? I think that might be what patience looks like….resting. Which, seems to come right back to trust.
Are you ‘waiting’? What are you waiting for? The test result? That phone call or email? That job offer? What would it look like to wait patiently? To trust in the waiting? To sense God’s loving arms wrapped around you in the middle of the howling, wide open space?

Consider praying not only for your situation but also for your waiting. Resist making the waiting a negative place but consider allowing the waiting to be a place of formation – the waiting itself a place of rest and trust.

Grace and peace –
Deb